Words Of Wisdom..

[3Hummer]

we all have probably heard many, and read many off those stupid fortune cookies which give words of wisdoms instead of fortunes but if you hear any good ones post em up! Here are my two favorite

"It is better to persue and not recieve, than it is to not try to persue and never know the outcome" I actually came up with that one when talking to a friend one day,

and my all time favorite : "Give a man a fish feed him for a day, teach a man to fish feed him for life" thats an ancient chinese saying

"If you are in a hurry you will never get there" Ancient Chinese proverb

"If your going through Hel1, keep going"- from the video game Blazing Angels

If you have any post em up!

[frenzy1]

Good ones !!!!

[DRTYFN]

:shhh:

[CO Hummer]

I'm partial to: "Ahhm...Bobbing".

[K9sH3]

Do what you want, want what you do!

Grow old not up.

and my favorite " Shut up biatch, I'm driving" :giggling:

[usetosellhummer]

love your job and you'll never work a day in your life

[KenP]

Don't forget to wipe.

[CO Hummer]

Employees must wash hands before returning to work.

[KenP]

Don't forget to wash your crack.

[CO Hummer]

Please do not flush sanitary napkins.

[Khoolhandz]

If life throws you a lemon, bust out the salt and tequila.

[KenP]

If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat.

[CO Hummer]

Caution: This product was produced in a facility that manufactures peanuts.

[KenP]

Do not put blow dryer in tub.

[KenP]

Do not use with petroleum based lubrications.

Brown capper:clapping:

[CO Hummer]

Please put your tray tables up and your seatbacks in an upright and locked position.

[bparker]

I am sorry, my give a $hit is broke

[h2co-pilot]

Nationwide is on your side.

[dеiтайожни]

I am sorry, my give a $hit is broke

That's called constipation, it's perfectly normal and is nothing to apologize for.

[DennisAJC]

May cause hair loss.....

[usetosellhummer]

Please discontinue use if you suffer a burning sensation when urinenating

[usetosellhummer]

please discard after use

[KenP]

Although erections lasting for more than 4 hours may occur rarely with all ED treatments in this drug class, to avoid long-term injuries, it is important to seek immediate medical help.

[HummerHippy]

I can't read french - but this is reportedly from a laptop bag label.

Someone translate for me.

[CO Hummer]

I'm not only the Pirate club for men president.....I'm also a client.

[3Hummer]

and some other ones:

"When life gives you lemons make lemonade"

"Lifes a garden, dig it"

"Treat Others how you would want others to treat you"

[CO Hummer]

Ahoy, matey.

[JamesT]

"Son...Stand up before you fall down." My famous quote after 5 glasses for JW Black

[h2co-pilot]

By Mennen.

[h2co-pilot]

Mama keeps whites bright like the sunlight.

[CO Hummer]

I never meant to cause you... any trouble. I never meant to cause you... any pain.

[h2co-pilot]

I only wanted to one time see you laughin.....

[Steve - SanJose]

side effects of this overprescribed medication include stroke and heart disease...

[KenP]

I never meant to cause you... any trouble. I never meant to cause you... any pain.
I only wanted to one time see you laughin.....Didn't I hear that last night.:perfect10s:

Clicky teh linky (http://video.google.com/url?vidurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3F v%3DcSJ0tMrsUsY&docid=8152206595341439686&ev=v&esrc=sr4&usg=AL29H23tLt9FIeX3-PcOCJXL09MiIUZkHg)

[K9sH3]

Although erections lasting for more than 4 hours may occur rarely with all ED treatments in this drug class, to avoid long-term injuries, it is important to seek immediate medical help.


Ummm, Nurse can you help me with this! ;)

[CO Hummer]

O-once there was this ki-id who.........

[dеiтайожни]

1 is the loneliest number...

http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/1046/oneik9.jpg

[KenP]

1 is the loneliest number...

http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/1046/oneik9.jpgI remember when you camped out there all the time and you didn't have many posts. Lot's of peeps thought you were weird... Some still think you are.:giggling:

[dеiтайожни]

I remember when you camped out there all the time and you didn't have many posts. Lot's of peeps thought you were weird... Some still think you are.:giggling:

How do you know? You hardly ever came in the chat! :crying: And what do you mean lots of peeps thought I was weird? This is all news to me. :confused: All you guys talked about were Viagra and mortgages, I felt too out of place to talk for awhile, it happens.

[h2co-pilot]

O-once there was this ki-id who.........

Once there was this gi-irl who.......

(where is the mmm mmm linky ;))

[timgco]

...may cause prolonged errection.

....may cause anal leakage.

.....allright stop, collaberate and listen. ice is back with a brand new...

......that was my first Asain!

....... Why don;t you try getting jerked off under the table in front of the whole family....and have some real problems.

..........Pedicure manicure kitty-cat claws- The way she climbs up and down them poles -Looking like one of them putty-cat dolls...

............
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Hummer Authority
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Rain City, WA
Posts: 1,152
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http://www.elcovaforums.com/forums/images/icons/icon1.gif Re: New 2008 interior?
I've decided not to trade our '04 for a new model because the differences are not material enough for me. I wonder when the exterior will go through a metamorphosis? I just hope they keep with the "Hummer" lineage.



:jump:

[3Hummer]

"If it doesnt flow dont go"

[usetosellhummer]

"If the blast don't get you then the fallout will"

[3Hummer]

and another classic "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me"

[Sewie]

and another classic "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me"

You seem to be missing the point of this thread. ;)

[CO Hummer]

Makin' copies.

[wpage]

Stich in time saves nine.;)

[GLBLWARMR]

"Do not use if you cannot see clearly to read the information in the information booklet." -- In the information booklet. http://www.rinkworks.com/im/new.gif
"Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish." -- On a bottle of shampoo for dogs.
"For external use only!" -- On a curling iron.
"Warning: This product can burn eyes." -- On a curling iron.
"Do not use in shower." -- On a hair dryer.
"Do not use while sleeping." -- On a hair dryer.
"Do not use while sleeping or unconscious." -- On a hand-held massaging device.
"Do not place this product into any electronic equipment." -- On the case of a chocolate CD in a gift basket.
"Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking." -- On a toilet at a public sports facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan.
"Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover." -- On a pair of shin guards made for bicyclists.
"This product not intended for use as a dental drill." -- On an electric rotary tool.
"Caution: Do not spray in eyes." -- On a container of underarm deodorant.
"Do not drive with sunshield in place." -- On a cardboard sunshield that keeps the sun off the dashboard.
"Caution: This is not a safety protective device." -- On a plastic toy helmet used as a container for popcorn.
"Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks." -- On an "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter.
"Battery may explore or leak." -- On a battery. See a scanned image (http://www.rinkworks.com/said/im/battery.shtml).
"Do not eat toner." -- On a toner cartridge for a laser printer.
"Not intended for highway use." -- On a 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow.
"This product is not to be used in bathrooms." -- On a Holmes bathroom heater.
"May irritate eyes." -- On a can of self-defense pepper spray.
"Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." -- On a novelty rock garden set called "Popcorn Rock."
"Caution! Contents hot!" -- On a Domino's Pizza box.
"Caution: Hot beverages are hot!" -- On a coffee cup.
"Warning: May contain small parts." -- On a frisbee.
"Do not use orally." -- On a toilet bowl cleaning brush.
"Please keep out of children." -- On a butcher knife.
"Not suitable for children aged 36 months or less." -- On a birthday card for a 1 year old.
"Do not recharge, put in backwards, or use." -- On a battery.
"Warning: Do not use on eyes." -- In the manual for a heated seat cushion.
"Do not look into laser with remaining eye." -- On a laser pointer.
"Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven.
"For use on animals only." -- On an electric cattle prod.
"For use by trained personnel only." -- On a can of air freshener.
"Keep out of reach of children and teenagers." -- On a can of air freshener.
"Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you." -- On a motorcycle helmet-mounted rear-view mirror.
"Warning: Riders of personal watercraft may suffer injury due to the forceful injection of water into body cavities either by falling into the water or while mounting the craft." -- In the manual for a jetski.
"Warning: Do not climb inside this bag and zip it up. Doing so will cause injury and death." -- A label inside a protective bag (for fragile objects), which measures 15cm by 15cm by 12cm.
"Do not use as ear plugs." -- On a package of silly putty.
"Please store in the cold section of the refrigerator." -- On a bag of fresh grapes in Australia.
"Warning: knives are sharp!" -- On the packaging of a sharpening stone.
"Not for weight control." -- On a pack of Breath Savers.
"Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth." -- On the label of a bottled drink.
"Theft of this container is a crime." -- On a milk crate.
"Do not use intimately." -- On a tube of deodorant.
"Warning: has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice." -- On a box of rat poison.
"Fragile. Do not drop." -- Posted on a Boeing 757.
"Cannot be made non-poisonous." -- On the back of a can of de-icing windshield fluid.
"Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage." -- On a portable stroller.
"Excessive dust may be irritating to shin and eyes." -- On a tube of agarose powder, used to make gels.
"Look before driving." -- On the dash board of a mail truck.
"Do not iron clothes on body." -- On packaging for a Rowenta iron.
"Do not drive car or operate machinery." -- On Boot's children's cough medicine.
"For indoor or outdoor use only." -- On a string of Christmas lights.
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." -- On a child sized Superman costume.
"This door is alarmed from 7:00pm - 7:00am." -- On a hospital's outside access door.
"Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted." -- On a sign at a railroad station.
"Warning: do not use if you have prostate problems." -- On a box of Midol PMS relief tablets.
"Product will be hot after heating." -- On a supermarket dessert box.
"Do not turn upside down." -- On the bottom of a supermarket dessert box.
"Do not light in face. Do not expose to flame." -- On a lighter.
"Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball." -- On the label for a cheap rubber ball toy.
"Not for human consumption." -- On a package of dice.
"May be harmful if swallowed." -- On a shipment of hammers.
"Using Ingenio cookware to destroy your old pots may void your warranty." -- A printed message that appears in a television advertisement when the presenter demonstrates how strong the cookware is by using it to beat up and destroy a regular frying pan.
"Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand." -- In the manual for a Swedish chainsaw.
"Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers." -- From a manual for an SGI computer.
"Warning: May contain nuts." -- On a package of peanuts.
"Do not eat." -- On a slip of paper in a stereo box, referring to the styrofoam packing.
"Do not eat if seal is missing." -- On said seal.
"Remove occupants from the stroller before folding it."
"Access hole only -- not intended for use in lifting box." -- On the sides of a shipping carton, just above cut-out openings which one would assume were handholds.
"Warning: May cause drowsiness." -- On a bottle of Nytol, a brand of sleeping pills.
"Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death." -- Stamped on the metal barrel of a .22 calibre rifle.
"Do not use orally after using rectally." -- In the instructions for an electric thermometer.
"Turn off motor before using this product." -- On the packaging for a chain saw file, used to sharpen the cutting teeth on the chain.
"Not to be used as a personal flotation device." -- On a 6x10 inch inflatable picture frame.
"Do not put in mouth." -- On a box of bottle rockets.
"Remove plastic before eating." -- On the wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack.
"Not dishwasher safe." -- On a remote control for a TV.
"For lifting purposes only." -- On the box for a car jack.
"Do not put lit candles on phone." -- On the instructions for a cordless phone.
"Warning! This is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants." -- On the packaging for a wristwatch.

[CO Hummer]

I know ya miss me. I know ya miss me.

[KenP]

If it iches, scratch it.

[3Hummer]

"Those who go to sleep with itchy but, wake up with stinky finger"

[h2co-pilot]

Face down. Ass up. ........

[bparker]

My fav :D
Face down. Ass up. ........

[CO Hummer]

There are plenty of stupid questions, so don't open your pie-hole until you're sure it's a good one.

[KenP]

As confused as a hungry baby in a topless bar.

She's got more wrinkles than an elephants scrotum.

Don't be as tight as a camel's ass in a sand storm.

She's strocked more wood then a furniture polisher.

As confused as a blind lesbian at a fish market.

As worn out as a cucumber in a convent.

:giggling: :jump: :giggling: