| PARAGON |
01-03-2006 11:32 PM |
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<H2 align=center>50 Fun Things To Do In An Elevator </H2>
- <LI>Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
<LI>Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of the Kleenex to the other
passengers.
<LI>Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: 'Shut up,
dammit, all of you just SHUT UP!'
<LI>Whistle the first seven notes of 'It's a Small World' incessantly.
<LI>Sell Girl Scout cookies.
<LI>On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
<LI>Shave.
<LI>Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask: 'Got
enough air in there?'
<LI>Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside down.
<LI>Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting
off.
<LI>When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then
act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
<LI>Lean over to another passenger and whisper: 'Noogie patrol coming!'
<LI>Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to
call you Admiral.
<LI>One word: flatulence!
<LI>On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until
you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go 'plink' at the bottom.
<LI>Do Tai Chi exercises.
<LI>Stare, grinning, at other passengers for a while, and then announce 'I've
got new socks on!'
<LI>When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: 'Oh not now, damn
motion sickness.'
<LI>Give religious tracts to each passenger.
<LI>Meow occasionally.
<LI>Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
<LI>Frown, mutter 'Gotta go, gotta go' then sigh and say 'oops!'
<LI>Show the other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
<LI>Sing 'Mary had a little lamb' while continually pushing buttons.
<LI>Holler 'Chutes away!' whenever the elevator descends.
<LI>Walk on with a cooler that says 'human head' on the side.
<LI>Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce 'You're one of THEM!'
and move to the far corner of the elevator.
<LI>Burp and then say 'mmm...tasty!'
<LI>Leave a box between the doors.
<LI>Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the buttons for them.
<LI>Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers 'through' it.
<LI>Start a singalong.
<LI>When the elevator is silent, look around and ask 'is that your beeper?'
<LI>Play the harmonica.
<LI>Shadow box.
<LI>Say 'Ding!' at each floor.
<LI>Lean against the button panel.
<LI>Say 'I wonder what all these do' and push the red buttons.
<LI>Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
<LI>Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other
passengers that this is your 'personal space'.
<LI>bring a chair along.
<LI>Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger : 'Wanna see wha in muh
mouf?'
<LI>Blow soap bubbles.
<LI>Pull gum out of your mouth in long strings.
<LI>Announce in a demonic voice: 'I must find a more suitable host body.'
<LI>Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
<LI>Make explosion noises when someone presses a button.
<LI>Wear 'X-ray Specs' and leer suggestively at other passengers.
<LI>Stare at your thumb and say 'I think it's getting larger.'
<LI>If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler 'Bad Touch'
</LI>
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