You should be ashamed of yourself telling them lies.
I can answer your question.
That's a medal.
I've seen medals before, and that looks like a medal to me.
Hell, I've even been awarded a few back in the day....
That one's special though....
I believe it to be the medal awarded to those released from prison.
You know, people that were able to maintain their virginity throughout their sentence receive the honorable tiny butthole paper roll!
