I was traveling between Phoenix and Chicago the other day and south of Kansas City when a tire blew out.. Checking my spare, I found that it too was flat. My only option was to flag down a passing motorist and get a ride to the next town. The first vehicle to stop was an old man in a van. He yelled out the window, "Need a lift?" "Yes, I sure do," I replied. "You a Democrat or Republican?" asked the old man. "Republican," I replied. "Well, you can just go to Hell," yelled the old man as he sped off. Another guy stopped, rolled down the window, and asked me the same question. Again, I gave the same answer, "Republican". The driver gave me the finger and drove off. I thought it over and decided that maybe I should change my strategy, since this area seemed to be overly political and there appeared to be few Republicans. The next car to stop was a red convertible driven by a beautiful blonde. She smiled seductively and asked if I was a Democrat or Republican. "Democrat!" I shouted. "Hop in!" replied the blonde. Driving down the road, I couldn't help but stare at this gorgeous woman in the seat next to me, the wind blowing through her hair, perfect breasts, and a short skirt that continued to ride higher and higher up her thighs. Finally, I yelled, "Please stop the car." She immediately slammed on the brakes and as soon as the car stopped, I jumped out. "What's the matter?" she asked. "I can't take it anymore," I replied. "I've only been a Democrat for five minutes and already, I want to screw somebody.