|
|
01-15-2008, 08:09 AM
|
|
Hummer Guru
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Dallas, TX USA
Posts: 2,314
|
|
SEX
What Not To Name Your Dog
Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Spot" I made the mistake of calling mine "Sex".
Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to city hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like to have one too!" Then I said, "But this is for a dog." He said, "I don't care what she looks like." Then I said, "You don't understand, I've had Sex since I was nine years old." He said, "You must have been quite a kid."
When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. Not wanting the dog to bother us, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the place was for sex. I said, "You don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at night." The clerk said, "Me too."
One day I entered Sex in a dog show, before the competition began, another contestant asked me what I was doing. I told him that I planned to have Sex in the show. He said that I should have sold my own tickets. When I asked if the show was televised he called me a pervert.
I left my dog at the Veterinarian. When I went to pick him up I said, "I've come for my dog." She said, "Which one, Spot or Rover?" I said, "What about Sex?" She slapped me. After I straightened out the misunderstanding, I asked if Sex was good for her. She slapped me again.
Sex ran away, I went to the dog pound. As I was looking in all the cages the operator came up to me. I said I'm looking for Sex. He said I was looking in all the wrong places.
When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married." He said, "What's your point, so did I." I said, "But my wife wants to take Sex away." He said, "That's what happens in a divorce."
Last night Sex ran off. I spent hours looking for him all over town. A cop came over to me and asked, "What are you doing in this alley at 4 o'clock in the morning?" I said I was looking for Sex.
My case comes up Friday.
|
01-15-2008, 12:28 PM
|
Hummer Expert
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Grass Lake,Mi
Posts: 583
|
|
Re: SEX
Thats why my dog is named "Porkchop!"
|
01-15-2008, 12:41 PM
|
|
Hummer Guru
|
|
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Stouts Creek
Posts: 4,192
|
|
Re: SEX
My dog has no hind legs and steel balls...
Sparky is his moniker!
__________________
"For God so loved the world he gave his only son that whoever believe in him would not perish but have everlasting life. "
(John 3:16)
2006 H3 Slate Blue,Header,Jacked,CAI,Toyo35's,HHO.
Priors...
Explorer
Commander
71 Vette
You Name it!
|
01-15-2008, 02:37 PM
|
|
Hummer Guru
|
|
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Europe, Belgium, Waregem
Posts: 5,280
|
|
Re: SEX
|
01-15-2008, 03:51 PM
|
|
Hummer Messiah
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Virginia Beach
Posts: 37,474
|
|
Re: SEX
That's pretty funny, B.
__________________
"My reading of history convinces me that most bad government results from too much government."---Thomas Jefferson
|
01-15-2008, 04:13 PM
|
|
Hummer Guru
|
|
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Brooklyn,NY,USA
Posts: 2,331
|
|
Re: SEX
I'm always chasing after sex.
__________________
GO PENS
|
01-15-2008, 04:17 PM
|
|
Hummer Guru
|
|
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Virginia Beach
Posts: 5,081
|
|
Re: SEX
|
01-15-2008, 06:04 PM
|
|
Hummer Guru
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,871
|
|
Re: SEX
OMG, that was awesome!
|
01-15-2008, 06:05 PM
|
|
Hummer Guru
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,871
|
|
Re: SEX
Quote:
Originally Posted by wpage
My dog has no hind legs and steel balls...
Sparky is his moniker!
|
Another good one!!!
|
01-16-2008, 03:27 AM
|
|
Hummer Professional
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: FLORIDA
Posts: 293
|
|
Re: SEX
That was great
|
01-16-2008, 03:53 AM
|
Hummer Veteran
|
|
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Santa Barbara, Calif.
Posts: 131
|
|
Re: SEX
Good joke!
|
01-16-2008, 04:08 AM
|
|
Hummer Guru
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,195
|
|
Re: SEX
hahahhaha awsome, thats why my dogs name is Buns or Bunny however her real name according to my mom and sis is Coco
__________________
2003 H1 HMCS: Ocean Blue Metallic, Grey Leather Interior
2010 H3 Alpha: Canyon Metallic, Cashmere Interior
2017 VW Jetta S
2012 Cessna 182T Skylane
used to have: 2007 base H3 Slate Blue
/''T''|[___|___]
[---T--L -OlllllllO-]
()_)"""()_)/"**"\)_)
|
01-16-2008, 04:30 AM
|
|
Hummer Authority
|
|
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: The user name says it all.
Posts: 1,280
|
|
Re: SEX
__________________
If life gives you lemons, ask for a more practical fruit.
|
Thread Tools |
Search this Thread |
|
|
Display Modes |
Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 09:17 AM.
|