Why do H2s suck so hard?

[Coshmi]

Ok let me tell you why I don't like hummers. That snow storm we had in 2010 I was driving my 1988 ford festiva to work and there was a hummer in a snow bank so I pullover and help him out by towing his 3,400lb SUV out of the snow. He thin turns around and speeds away with my car still attached. I found my car on it's roof about 4 miles away! Needless to say my car was totaled and that's why I hate hummers. Now why are almost all hummer owners jerks? and too busy inhaling furious amounts of dick to help a stranded motorist?