All about DRTFN

[KenP]

Sorry buddy, but it's all about you.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,357323,00.html

Here are some major red flags that you may have a problem with pornography:

1. You?ve become anti-social.

You are spending more time with pornography than you are with the outside world. If you are single (and even if you are putting yourself out there) your preoccupation with porn may be hindering your ability to establish long-term, monogamous relationships. If you are involved with someone, you may find yourself bowing out of couple and familial obligations to steal moments with your laptop or DVD player. Bottom line: You only have eyes for porn stars and no one else.
2. You?re lying to your partner.

Your once honest relationship is now plagued by secrecy and dishonesty as you try to hide your porn habit. About 70 percent of people keep their porn use a secret. And many will go to all sorts of extremes in making sure that they are not found out. Even when busted, many will do or say anything to hide the truth.

3. Your partner is no longer attractive.

Unbeknownst to your partner, s/he has competition ? and it?s your favorite porn star. Obsessed with fantasy characters, you find it hard to get turned on to the real thing, including yourself. That?s right; you?re not even letting yourself off the hook. Casting yourself against fiction, you?re sizing yourself up as unattractive. Either way, you are likely avoiding or completely uninterested in sex with your lover.

4. Your sex life with your partner is suffering.

Both your sexual desire and functioning, including arousal, have taken a nose dive. You and your lover are feeling robbed of romance, passion and emotional closeness. This is because you are not truly present with your partner. Emotionally distant, you are too busy having sex with porn. Ultimately, you are dissatisfied with your actual sex life, and this is affecting your relationship.

5. Your concept of ?real intimacy? has become warped.

When you re-emerge from the fantasy world, you?re finding that your expectations about sex, sexual partners and intimacy have become unrealistic. You?re only interested in those who look and act like porn stars (which severely limit your dating pool if single). Sadly, you start to think there must be something ?wrong? your lover for not putting out like a porn star. Furthermore, you?re objectifying others, wondering what he or she would look like unclothed or how they would act during sex.

6. The habit is causing you distress.

Torn between desire and shame, your use of porn is causing you physiological and emotional distress. You may feel like a ?sex pervert,? or suffer from isolation, shame, anger, unrest, depression and irritability. You may be distressed over the fact that using porn conflicts with your value system. Overall, your porn kink is starting to cause family, work, legal and/or spiritual problems.

7. You are engaging in risky behaviors.

You might be OK with ideas that usually make you think twice, for instance, having unprotected sex, but now you are engaging in behavior that is out of control. Soliciting a prostitute, looking at child pornography or anything involving animals or violence warrants a need for help.
If your porn habit is causing you to neglect important life matters, you should seek professional help, especially if it is causing you and your partner distress. A sex counselor or therapist may be able to help.