JamesT
10-06-2005, 02:59 PM
I started a BLOG cuz I hate my HOA and were fighting them. http://hoanazis.blogspot.com/
This is what one lady wrote. After that was my responce. I think DRTY would be proud of me.
James Thomas,
If you are seen outside plan on having your ass kicked by my husband. He read all of the statements on this list and he said that you are an ass that just needs your ass handed to him.
Oh and dont bother writting back any smart ass comments because that will only make it worse for you.
You'll know it when he's breaking your face open and slamming it on that piece of **** Hummer. The only reason you drive that is to make up for being 1/2 of a man.
Cant wait to see you with a broken nose.
So I wrote:
JamesT said...
WOW! Thanks for the attention. Tell hubby I am at 26216 Upton Creek. Usually home by 6. I assume that the statemnt 'needs his ass handed to him' is just a metaphor for beating me up. Oh...metaphore means: a figure of speech in which a word or phrase literally denoting one kind of object or idea is used in place of another to suggest a likeness or analogy between them.
Please ask him to not slam my face on the Hummer. Do you have any idea how tough it is to get blood off of white paint if it dries? Just imagine what it would be like if one night while you and hubby were pluckin the feathers off your chickens for vittles using the hood of your 1974 Vega and one of them 'sum beaches' scratched you with his tallons (toe nails) and you started to bleed all over the paint or worse yet, on the duct tape (duct tape or duck tape?) that no doubt is holding the front headlight on. Wouldnt that be horrible? You'de have to get on the VIA bus, (becuase the Vega is surely up on blocks from having to sell the tires at the flea market so you could spring for a whole carton of smokes and not the usual pack) go all the way to the store to buy soap only to discover that HEB wont accept your Lone Star card for soap. Now what? Go back on VIA, tell hubby you cant wash the blood off the Vega, have to let him slap you around a little for being so stupid and reminding you that what you should have done is take the rest of Jethro Jr's change out of his piggy bank (thats the empty soup can next to the ash tray in his room) to buy the soap.
Rather, there is a nice big rock in my yard he can use. No worries about that getting stained.
Why do people attack the Hummer? I dont get that. Why not just say "James you are 1/2 of a man?" Why waste words on an inanimate object. I have MANY MANY faults that are easy targets. Please stick to those when launching a verbal assault on me.
As far as the broken nose thing. I'de rather he didnt. You see, I am not a very attractive man as it is and I hate to think what a broken nose would do. Maybe just a black eye or a swollen lip. Other than that, I guess I am up for a good ol' ass woopin.
So, how was that? "Un" smart ass enough for you?
I think its kinda funny.
Hope to see ya soon. Ya'll come back now, ya hear?
9:25 AM
JamesT said...
Darn. Forgot one more thing. How in the hell can you afford a computer? I want to know how you learned to use it. Did they have classes in "the big house?" I hate to presume anything but I cant help but wonder. Maybe Jethro Jr. helped. No doubt he's a computer wiz kid. I mean, he's the family genious (my spelling sucks) and all since he's the first to graduate the 7th grade. Hell, I bet it only took 3-4 years too. I can only imaging you and Jr. sitting there sharing an ash tray working as a team, mother and son, discovering the wonderful world of the internet. Oh, and theres hubby in the backgroud sitting in his favorite chair sipping on a liabtion (that means adult beverage) (beer...probably some malt liquor) yelling at you to hurry up bit#* and fetch me a bag of pork rynes. Lucky for you, his sister just showed up and their headin of to the bedroom for a little "family" time themselves. Which reminds me. How is Jr's 6th toe and 3rd ear?
I would love to go on but I have a job and need to get some work done. Look, I did it again. JOB. Thats where us 1/2 men go to earn money to support our family. We get a weekly item called a PAYCHECK. It's kinda like the one you get from the government but us 1/2 men dont have to sit by the mailbox and pester the poor mail man for it on the 1st of the month.
This is what one lady wrote. After that was my responce. I think DRTY would be proud of me.
James Thomas,
If you are seen outside plan on having your ass kicked by my husband. He read all of the statements on this list and he said that you are an ass that just needs your ass handed to him.
Oh and dont bother writting back any smart ass comments because that will only make it worse for you.
You'll know it when he's breaking your face open and slamming it on that piece of **** Hummer. The only reason you drive that is to make up for being 1/2 of a man.
Cant wait to see you with a broken nose.
So I wrote:
JamesT said...
WOW! Thanks for the attention. Tell hubby I am at 26216 Upton Creek. Usually home by 6. I assume that the statemnt 'needs his ass handed to him' is just a metaphor for beating me up. Oh...metaphore means: a figure of speech in which a word or phrase literally denoting one kind of object or idea is used in place of another to suggest a likeness or analogy between them.
Please ask him to not slam my face on the Hummer. Do you have any idea how tough it is to get blood off of white paint if it dries? Just imagine what it would be like if one night while you and hubby were pluckin the feathers off your chickens for vittles using the hood of your 1974 Vega and one of them 'sum beaches' scratched you with his tallons (toe nails) and you started to bleed all over the paint or worse yet, on the duct tape (duct tape or duck tape?) that no doubt is holding the front headlight on. Wouldnt that be horrible? You'de have to get on the VIA bus, (becuase the Vega is surely up on blocks from having to sell the tires at the flea market so you could spring for a whole carton of smokes and not the usual pack) go all the way to the store to buy soap only to discover that HEB wont accept your Lone Star card for soap. Now what? Go back on VIA, tell hubby you cant wash the blood off the Vega, have to let him slap you around a little for being so stupid and reminding you that what you should have done is take the rest of Jethro Jr's change out of his piggy bank (thats the empty soup can next to the ash tray in his room) to buy the soap.
Rather, there is a nice big rock in my yard he can use. No worries about that getting stained.
Why do people attack the Hummer? I dont get that. Why not just say "James you are 1/2 of a man?" Why waste words on an inanimate object. I have MANY MANY faults that are easy targets. Please stick to those when launching a verbal assault on me.
As far as the broken nose thing. I'de rather he didnt. You see, I am not a very attractive man as it is and I hate to think what a broken nose would do. Maybe just a black eye or a swollen lip. Other than that, I guess I am up for a good ol' ass woopin.
So, how was that? "Un" smart ass enough for you?
I think its kinda funny.
Hope to see ya soon. Ya'll come back now, ya hear?
9:25 AM
JamesT said...
Darn. Forgot one more thing. How in the hell can you afford a computer? I want to know how you learned to use it. Did they have classes in "the big house?" I hate to presume anything but I cant help but wonder. Maybe Jethro Jr. helped. No doubt he's a computer wiz kid. I mean, he's the family genious (my spelling sucks) and all since he's the first to graduate the 7th grade. Hell, I bet it only took 3-4 years too. I can only imaging you and Jr. sitting there sharing an ash tray working as a team, mother and son, discovering the wonderful world of the internet. Oh, and theres hubby in the backgroud sitting in his favorite chair sipping on a liabtion (that means adult beverage) (beer...probably some malt liquor) yelling at you to hurry up bit#* and fetch me a bag of pork rynes. Lucky for you, his sister just showed up and their headin of to the bedroom for a little "family" time themselves. Which reminds me. How is Jr's 6th toe and 3rd ear?
I would love to go on but I have a job and need to get some work done. Look, I did it again. JOB. Thats where us 1/2 men go to earn money to support our family. We get a weekly item called a PAYCHECK. It's kinda like the one you get from the government but us 1/2 men dont have to sit by the mailbox and pester the poor mail man for it on the 1st of the month.