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View Full Version : My H3 is so slow Jokes =)


bparker
09-09-2005, 01:51 AM
In effort to be light hearted about this subject lets see what you guys can come up with.

Here is mine see if you can top it.

"My H3 is so slow I took off to work on Monday moning and when I got there it was Friday"

bparker
09-09-2005, 01:51 AM
In effort to be light hearted about this subject lets see what you guys can come up with.

Here is mine see if you can top it.

"My H3 is so slow I took off to work on Monday moning and when I got there it was Friday"

bparker
09-09-2005, 01:54 AM
Here is another:

"So this guy pulls up next to me at this red light and looks over with a smirk and then asks me if I wanted to run'em off the green light; I said sure why not, and even after he used all of his "10 speeds" on his bike, I still smoked him"

DRTYFN
09-09-2005, 03:58 AM
Actually, it's not that slow. Your driving skills might be lacking, but the H3 isn't the slug everyone is painting out to be. It's no sports car, but it's no slouch either.

MyxH3
09-09-2005, 04:01 AM
It has more poer than my 2001 Xterra did,But jokes are always cool.

Surferjo
09-09-2005, 10:00 AM
My H3 is so slow I had to use a calendar to measure the 1/4 mile time.

bparker
09-09-2005, 10:00 AM
Guys, I know its not "that" slow. But so many ask about its performance (like it even matters) as its not a performance vehicle.

So, I thought it would just be funny to roll with is and crack a few off..

I guess you guys arent catching my same spirit here and thats ok.

I went from 2 cars to 1 and 1 of them was a 2002 Z06 Corvette - so when I hear talk about power and speed I chuckle to myself - because - wats the point? These are not performance trucks - I fully accept this and why not joke about it.

Surferjo
09-09-2005, 11:03 AM
When I did the test drive it was pretty slow but who cares. I didn't. I bought it anyway. I can’t wait for my 5-cylinder uber-slug to show up.

Now if you want to talk about slow lets talk about the H3 production line. JK, I’m a little sour due to my Sunroof calamity.

Its been said on this forum about a million times. It’s not a sports car.

I don’t know why people get so bent out of shape when it’s referred to as slow. If you bought it for speed I think you may have made a mistake.

Hell even GM has confirmed that next year the engine will have 25 more HP.

Personally I don’t care if it had a go-cart engine in it. I love they way this thing looks and drives and that’s all that really matters to me.

My H3 is so slow It was quicker to FedEx it to the next intersection.

evomind
09-09-2005, 12:11 PM
face it guys, its SLOW. i dont find it to be an issue, but when everyone else is making fairly quick SUVs its pretty noticeable.
not knocking the truck, i think the speed is adequate, but lets not get out of shape about it. it is what it is.
nothing a s/c couldnt cure anyway.
http://www.elcova.com/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

1COOLH3
09-09-2005, 12:24 PM
My H3 is so slow that I was given the bird by an Amish man in his buggy! http://www.elcova.com/infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

bparker
09-09-2005, 01:03 PM
LOL!!

Surferjo
09-09-2005, 02:01 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by 1COOLH3:
My H3 is so slow that I was given the bird by an Amish man in his buggy! http://www.elcova.com/infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

LMAO!!

That was a good one

H3OH
09-09-2005, 02:42 PM
My H3 is so fat...

When she auditioned for a part in Raiders of the Lost Ark she got the part of the big rolling ball.

My H3 is so slow...

She made speed stick slow down.


Okay, those suck and so does this thread. http://www.elcova.com/infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

First Hummer
09-09-2005, 04:43 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by H3OH:
My H3 is so fat...

When she auditioned for a part in Raiders of the Lost Ark she got the part of the big rolling ball.

My H3 is so slow...

She made speed stick slow down.


Okay, those suck and so does this thread. http://www.elcova.com/infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

My H3 is so slow my Bowel movements passed me.

bparker
09-09-2005, 05:02 PM
lmfao - did you see any signs saying "Please watch for falling logs? /cringe

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by First Hummer:
My H3 is so slow my Bowel movements passed me. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

First Hummer
09-09-2005, 05:07 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by bparker:
lmfao - did you see any signs saying "Please watch for falling logs? /cringe

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by First Hummer:
My H3 is so slow my Bowel movements passed me. </div></BLOCKQUOTE> </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Mudslide ahead, sorry couldnt resist.

HummerNewbie
09-09-2005, 05:21 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by First Hummer:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by bparker:
lmfao - did you see any signs saying "Please watch for falling logs? /cringe

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by First Hummer:
My H3 is so slow my Bowel movements passed me. </div></BLOCKQUOTE> </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Mudslide ahead, sorry couldnt resist. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Skid marks on the road http://www.elcova.com/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

H3OH
09-09-2005, 05:35 PM
Slippery When Wet

Objects in Mirror may be closer than they appear

mightypuck
09-12-2005, 01:32 AM
We've heard all the whining and complaints about the slow performance of the H3 http://www.elcova.com/infopop/emoticons/icon_mad.gif. So when will the Ferrari F430 Spider which does 0-62mph in 4.1 seconds be able to climb a 16 inch vertical wall, scale a 60% grade, traverse a 40% side slope or operate in up to 24 inches of water? Answer....NEVER!!! Compare apples to apples and oranges to oranges. The H3 is not a sports car.

HummerBuck
09-12-2005, 03:02 AM
My H3 is so slow - I pulled up to a stop light and saw DRTYFN next to me in his pink Civic (he won from selling Mary Kay). He challenged me to a race. Off the line, I was doing well against the pink Civic, and then I saw the ass of DRTYFN's girlfriend stick out of his trunk. She fired up her assterburner, and the civic went into orbit.

I guess the only thing that can beat me is an ass.

KenP
09-12-2005, 03:25 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by HummerBuck:
My H3 is so slow - I pulled up to a stop light and saw DRTYFN next to me in his pink Civic (he won from selling Mary Kay). He challenged me to a race. Off the line, I was doing well against the pink Civic, and then I saw the ass of DRTYFN's girlfriend stick out of his trunk. She fired up her assterburner, and the civic went into orbit.

I guess the only thing that can beat me is an ass. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>You are an ass. Where did that come from? <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content"> Originally posted by 1COOLH3:
My H3 is so slow that I was given the bird by an Amish man in his buggy! </div></BLOCKQUOTE>That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time. http://www.elcova.com/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

HummerBuck
09-12-2005, 03:31 AM
Wow! Supposed Deities (especially those who don't even own an H3) can dish it out, but they sure can't take it.

bparker
09-12-2005, 04:09 AM
Kenp, Dirty has/has an avatar of some chic shooting flames out her bunghole.

LMAO what a missunderstanding and I almost didnt want to say just to see where this would have went.

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by KenP:
</div></BLOCKQUOTE>
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content"> Where did that come from? </div></BLOCKQUOTE>