NEVER LET YOUR WIFE DRIVE YOUR HUMMER

[h2co-pilot]

Storytime!!!!:

Okay, When we first started dating, Ken always dressed nice but had this gold necklace and bracelet that he wore. They weren't Guido or anything but none-the-less that's what I always thought when I saw them. It was winter and you couldn't see them fully but would poke out every now and then and say "Hi, I'm Guido. How you doin'."

Well summer came, I had a small apartment near where I worked, it had a pool and I said he would have to come over with me and check it out. He mentioned that he wore a white speedo nuthuggers to the beach and pools and such. I was horrified, hell, he wore the jewelry, why not the little white suit?- I was really trying not to laugh imagining him with the suit- would his stuff show when it was wet OMFG....

"Are you there?"....long pause---

"yes.....Uhm, are you serious?"

"yeah, whats the problem?"

"..**Silently LMFAO** ...can you hold on?"

Tears streaming down my face. What was I going to say? Holy crap I can't just end it with him right now he'll know it was because of his ghey suit. Double crap, what will the neighbors think....Okay okay..think of Mammaw..(dead grandmother)....breathe...

"Okay, well yeah we could just...****convulsions and tears LMAO****... Do wear your necklace and stuff in the pool?"

"Yeah, I do it all the time. It's fine."

getting worried- he is serious. LMFAO X123,4567

"......can you hold on?...**LMAO**...okay sorry...wait....**LMAO***..."


Well, it went on and on. I blew it off thinking that he was joking but I didn't want to be mean just in case he was serious. Weeks went by and I mentioned it as the jewelry was showing more and more as the clothes were shedding. Deep down the Guidoness kept saying "nuthuggers, eh, how YOU doin'" I asked again, he still backed it up. I would ask him if he wanted to tag along suit shopping with me and maybe he could pick something out.

"I have a discount up at the surf shop. You can pick out a suit too."

"No thanks, I've got mine remember."

Weeks went by before he finally told me he was kidding. And I had to get him to stop wearing the Guido jewelry.