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03-09-2006, 10:33 PM
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Hummer Professional
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: someplace crappy
Posts: 476
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So, I was over at my folks house yesterday and we were all in the den that has a big picture window facing the street, low and behlold some mid aged lady walking her dog by my truck out in the street decides to stop, open her dog crap bag in her hand and smeer some on the side of the truck. Well my buddy that bought the lime green H2 (posted earlier) was with me and had a good idea, instead of running out there and giving her a tonuge lashing we filled a 5 gallon bucket with water and a butt load of vinegar in it. Caught up to her 2 blocks down and oh my God, like a big red bulls eye, totally hit our mark on completally drenching her. Wow she smelled awfull. Well of couse the police showed up at my house that night and I told them she better drop her charges or I file for property damage. Well all in all none were filed and the lesson learned here is---don't screw with my H2 (oh cool that rymes) and vinegar and water mixed together is a good deterrent but very stinky so don't spill on yourself while dumping on others.
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\'03 Lux "white" w/air suspension and kick ass tires (raised letters out) and a '07 jeep Wrangler 4dr Rubi that's just as cool!
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03-09-2006, 10:38 PM
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Hummer Authority
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Where you live??
Posts: 1,947
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well, that is some far fetched sounding ****e. but if its all true then GOOD 4 U
I wouldnt have had the patience of you and would have most likely ran out and done something a little more assenine thus landing myself in jail
GOOD JOB
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I'm Gonna crazy you my body
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03-09-2006, 10:53 PM
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Hummer Professional
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Port Charlotte, Florida
Posts: 357
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I take it your'e really into "OVERKILL". How old are you? 16? Makes you look like an ass.
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2008 H3 Alpha - Boulder Gray
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03-09-2006, 10:56 PM
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Hummer Professional
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: someplace crappy
Posts: 476
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ya I don't know whats going on in my town, iv'e had a rash of tree huggers or something move in. I'm constantly getting fingers and tounge lashings from people here. You know this is the state that recently outlawed abortions.
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\'03 Lux "white" w/air suspension and kick ass tires (raised letters out) and a '07 jeep Wrangler 4dr Rubi that's just as cool!
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03-09-2006, 11:00 PM
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Hummer Professional
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: someplace crappy
Posts: 476
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and Ed G. you don't need to make fun, I'm just telling a funny story that might be interesting to some. By the way 36 so I was just out with a buddy having a little fun.
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\'03 Lux "white" w/air suspension and kick ass tires (raised letters out) and a '07 jeep Wrangler 4dr Rubi that's just as cool!
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03-09-2006, 11:18 PM
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Hummer Expert
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: CO
Posts: 594
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Quote:
I take it your'e really into "OVERKILL". How old are you? 16? Makes you look like an ass.
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What would you have done??!! Politely thanked her for smearing sh*t on your rig? I agree with Alec on the sheit on the face, but that probably would have landed him in the concrete hilton for assault.
Not tolerating others' lack of foresight does not make one immature, and 2 wrongs doesn't make one right--but it sure as hell feels good to give someone their just desserts!
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\'05 Slate Blue Sut w/ Magnusun, JBA headers, custom exhaust, 22\" MC2 RT5 wheels, Pioneer AVIC Z1 nav, Passport SRX, Vizualogic A1000 dual, bi xenons, fog xenons, dual optimas, and just gettin\' started!
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03-09-2006, 11:20 PM
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Hummer Professional
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Maryland
Posts: 362
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WH -Well Done Dude!! Sometimes, you just gotta give what they've got coming!
Ed - lighten up man...
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A Hot wife and new little Ninja (Baby)
03 - Yellow H2 - Lux, Gobi 6' W/Tire & Ladder, Snowboard Rack + other Goodies
06 - Black Caddy SRX
01 - Ducati 748 Bip, Yellow- Giddy Up!!
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03-09-2006, 11:31 PM
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Hummer Professional
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: someplace crappy
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by the way Alec, my buddy and I are interested in going on one of the excursions you guys go on but being around South Dakota there isn't many places to climb. Can a novice driver keep up on one of the outings? I'm no dope at driving but have a lot to learn I would guess by you guys that always go on those things.
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\'03 Lux "white" w/air suspension and kick ass tires (raised letters out) and a '07 jeep Wrangler 4dr Rubi that's just as cool!
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03-09-2006, 11:32 PM
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Hummer Authority
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Join Date: Oct 2005
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Yeah Alec...you would have been in the cell with me But seriously i couldnt have just watched her do that and then walk away. Smearing dog poo in her face would have been justified and worth the nite in jail.
Quote:
Originally posted by Alec W:
I would have gone down there before she left and smeared the rest of her dogs **** all over her face.
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I'm Gonna crazy you my body
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03-09-2006, 11:35 PM
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Hummer Guru
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: I CAN BARELY SEE THE ROAD...
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Perfect! I don't think I would have been able to hold back in that situation....and would have acted first and thought second = not spending the night in my warm bed.
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Black Sheep Hummer Squadron
( CenCal Chapter - Me, Myself, and I )
"OBAMA......Making Jimmy Carter LOOK GOOD!"
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03-10-2006, 12:10 AM
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Hummer Messiah
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: ENRAGEMENT FOR HIRE
Posts: 31,286
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BRAVO!!!!!! BRAVO!!!!!!!!
If it were me I would have caught up to her, drag her back to my driveway, shoot her dog, and call the cops. Then explain that the dog attacked you when you tried to intervene on the dung smearing.
Ahhhh **** it. Use bearspray.
Good job man.
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My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.
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03-10-2006, 12:23 AM
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Hummer Authority
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Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Home is where the H2 is..
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Her being an older person, I would hesitate throwing anything -- even water (lawsuit if she took a spill, fall, and broke her hip or get a heart attack or somethin).
I would instead insist on her washing all the dog poo, and while she's at it -- the rest of the truck, dry it, apply a good coat of wax, buff it, polish my bling wheels, armorall all the black trims, and rain-x all the windows.
I bet the local news crew wouldda showned up at the end of the 5-hours car wash..
That way, as many tree-huggers as possible wouldda learn the risk of messing with Hummers!!
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03-10-2006, 12:39 AM
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Hummer Professional
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: someplace crappy
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\'03 Lux "white" w/air suspension and kick ass tires (raised letters out) and a '07 jeep Wrangler 4dr Rubi that's just as cool!
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03-10-2006, 01:03 AM
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Hummer Messiah
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: ENRAGEMENT FOR HIRE
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It's not as funny if you've literally done it.
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My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.
My Video Collectionez
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03-10-2006, 01:05 AM
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Hummer Messiah
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: ENRAGEMENT FOR HIRE
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Quote:
Originally posted by H2Finally:
Her being an older person, I would hesitate throwing anything -- even water (lawsuit if she took a spill, fall, and broke her hip or get a heart attack or somethin).
I would instead insist on her washing all the dog poo, and while she's at it -- the rest of the truck, dry it, apply a good coat of wax, buff it, polish my bling wheels, armorall all the black trims, and rain-x all the windows.
I bet the local news crew wouldda showned up at the end of the 5-hours car wash..
That way, as many tree-huggers as possible wouldda learn the risk of messing with Hummers!!
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....And make her do it topless.
Nothin sweeter than watchin an old woman sport her pair of fried eggs on nails.
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My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.
My Video Collectionez
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03-10-2006, 01:13 AM
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Hummer Expert
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: CO
Posts: 594
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Quote:
Nothin sweeter than watchin an old woman sport her pair of fried eggs on nails
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Now is that torture for her or for you?!?!! That would be a sore sight indeed---baggy old tits scrubbing sheit off your rig Does that little scene come complete with a barf bag!!
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\'05 Slate Blue Sut w/ Magnusun, JBA headers, custom exhaust, 22\" MC2 RT5 wheels, Pioneer AVIC Z1 nav, Passport SRX, Vizualogic A1000 dual, bi xenons, fog xenons, dual optimas, and just gettin\' started!
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03-10-2006, 01:21 AM
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Hummer Expert
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: easbumfuk
Posts: 859
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You did the right thing buddy. I would have prolly gone out and made her lick it off . WOuldnt be the first time i spent the night in the slammer and probably wont be the last. ****ing Bitch.
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03-10-2006, 01:50 AM
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Hummer Messiah
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Federal penitentiary
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Fishing Again.
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