So I once hired a Macintosh dewd back in the day..

[bparker]

I ran across this pic and was laughing my ass off when I found it and thought I would post it.

We hired a high end software architect back in the day when we were working on some .com startups.

When he told us to get him a Mac we all cringed as we all know "mac people are special".

Well in any case this dood was weird as hell. He had a glass eye, a hump on his back like the hunch back of notre dame and he constantly farted and burped.

He was the most arrogant and egotistical tard on the planet and we later found out he basically didnt know **** about his job, he was FULL of BS and we let him go - but anyway he would NEVER go out to eat lunch with all of us. Never!

One day we came back early from lunch and his door was closed. We heard some strange gaggin noises coming from inside his office and got worried so I slowly opened the door to see WTF was going on.

Well, here is exactly how we found him. All laid back knocked out - snoring like a drunk that had knocked himself out with several 5ths of whiskey.

Blue lips and all he was struggling for air due to his weight - but in reality he was just taking his normal daily nap as we later found out when we were all out to lunch.

After I took the pic we were all crackin up about it in the office and I tried to show it to him and he FREAKED OUT and started jumping around like a monkey and acting like he was about to pass out. He then told me that he can not see himself alseep or he will wig out litterally or something strange like that....

Good times those were..

[h2co-pilot]

Chops Please.

[KenP]

Originally Posted by bparker

IWell in any case this dood was weird as hell. He had a glass eye, a hump on his back like the hunch back of notre dame and he constantly farted and burped.

WTF is wrong with that? Huh?!?! I ought to kick your a$$ for that comment!!!!


Edit: Sorry, I didn't notice the "glass eye" part. I don't have one of those.

[bparker]

LOL

If I had a glass eye I would put a backup cam in it...

[bparker]

man when he is leaning over your desk working together with you at close range and starts burping in your face where you can smell his gut and then farts - then tell me something

until then zip it

also this fuker and I got on a plane to orlando together for a tech conf and he farted right as we got to our seats! of course you know there is NO AIR moving in the plane at that time and it smelled SO FUKIN BAD and we just had to sit there and baste in it.

ohh ya I forgot to tell ya the freak had no sense of smell either so "he didnt mind or see the big problem" as he said as the rest of us collapse in the isle dying for fresh air

Originally Posted by KenP

WTF is wrong with that? Huh?!?! I ought to kick your a$$ for that comment!!!!


Edit: Sorry, I didn't notice the "glass eye" part. I don't have one of those.

[KenP]

Originally Posted by bparker

LOL

If I had a glass eye I would put a backup cam in it...

ROTFLMAO!!! I guess you'd need the the backup "beep-beep" to operate while moving forward when carrying all that weight.

[GLBLWARMR]

Boy the fun you could have with a glass eye. I would be the life of the party. Pull it out, yell "Hey Catch" and toss it to someone just to see their reaction. Imagine the possibilities.

[bparker]

Yea like when you are playing pool and scratch - you can say NO WAIT - pop out yer glass eye and sneak a shot!! Teehee

Originally Posted by GLBLWARMR

Boy the fun you could have with a glass eye. I would be the life of the party. Pull it out, yell "Hey Catch" and toss it to someone just to see their reaction. Imagine the possibilities.

[bparker]

NO ****! I am telling ya. And if you think he is large you shoulda seen his 6'4" 350 lb amazon gorilla wife too!!!
(Deuce Biggalo in Europe movie voice) THAT was a BIG BITCH!

Originally Posted by KenP

ROTFLMAO!!! I guess you'd need the the backup "beep-beep" to operate while moving forward when carrying all that weight.

[Mrs.ssippi]

Originally Posted by bparker

NO ****! I am telling ya. And if you think he is large you shoulda seen his 6'4" 350 lb amazon gorilla wife too!!!
(Deuce Biggalo in Europe movie voice) THAT was a BIG BITCH!

I alway think it is so strange to see two 300+ people together and see them with a baby. I think how in the hell did these people have sex to get the baby. Then I throw up in my mouth a little and try to think of pretty fields of flowers. And go to my happy place.

[KenP]

Originally Posted by Mrs.ssippi

I alway think it is so strange to see two 300+ people together and see them with a baby. I think how in the hell did these people have sex to get the baby. Then I throw up in my mouth a little and try to think of pretty fields of flowers. And go to my happy place.

Heehee, me too, but I don't think of the same types of flowers as you.

[Wisha Haddan H3]

Originally Posted by bparker

man when he is leaning over your desk working together with you at close range and starts burping in your face where you can smell his gut and then farts - then tell me something

ROFLMAO .... omg that's awful!

I used to work with an old bitty just like that ... except add smoker's cough and spittle. It was so bad if she ever came in my cube I had to wipe down my monitor and keyboard after she left. She used to sit in meetings with her pants pulled way up over her gut and - no joke - with her hand down the front ... farting and scratching herself. I don't know if she was enjoying the bubbles or what !!!!!! After she retired, no one would go in her cube it was so nasty. We joked about calling in hazmat but eventually asked the janitor come in and disinfect her office.

[Hmmm2]

Originally Posted by Wisha Haddan H3

ROFLMAO .... omg that's awful!

I used to work with an old bitty just like that ... except add smoker's cough and spittle. It was so bad if she ever came in my cube I had to wipe down my monitor and keyboard after she left. She used to sit in meetings with her pants pulled way up over her gut and - no joke - with her hand down the front ... farting and scratching herself. I don't know if she was enjoying the bubbles or what !!!!!! After she retired, no one would go in her cube it was so nasty. We joked about calling in hazmat but eventually asked the janitor come in and disinfect her office.

OMG!!!!! ()

[bparker]

That is just nasty X1000000

ok, dont lie now - did you hit it?

Originally Posted by Wisha Haddan H3

ROFLMAO .... omg that's awful!

I used to work with an old bitty just like that ... except add smoker's cough and spittle. It was so bad if she ever came in my cube I had to wipe down my monitor and keyboard after she left. She used to sit in meetings with her pants pulled way up over her gut and - no joke - with her hand down the front ... farting and scratching herself. I don't know if she was enjoying the bubbles or what !!!!!! After she retired, no one would go in her cube it was so nasty. We joked about calling in hazmat but eventually asked the janitor come in and disinfect her office.

[dеiтайожни]

Originally Posted by bparker

did you hit it?

Did you?

[bparker]

5 bucks says he did...

I bet the hand down the front of the pants thing turned him on - especially the scratching noises coming from that crocidile skin..

[DRTYFN]

Originally Posted by bparker

That is just nasty X1000000

ok, dont lie now - did you hit it?

:

I bet he did.

All I can think of is the nasty old hag landlady in KingPin.

[Wisha Haddan H3]

Originally Posted by bparker

That is just nasty X1000000

ok, dont lie now - did you hit it?

wtf are you kidding?

[DRTYFN]

Originally Posted by Wisha Haddan H3

wtf are you kidding?

You did, didn't you? ... because you sure ain't rushing out to deny it.

[Wisha Haddan H3]

Uh, no and hell no. It's a braver man than me that would risk running into whatever crawled up inside her and died. I'll leave that to dennis or drty

I mean seriously, this is what the janitors wore when they cleaned out her office.